Has anyone ever separated and had it go smoothly, efficiently, with everyone coming out of it unscathed and whole? What would be the recipe for that kind of well-roundedness? I supposed you'd have to be whole to begin with, prior to attaching yourself to this other person. Balanced, sure, and in control. Then you'd have to find the other balanced, sure, and in control individual that compliments you.
Sound like a math problem? Or a fairy tale? It pretty much is exactly that. Either too clinical, or unrealistic.
Relationships are messy. Like really dirty, filthy, dust under the stove that hasn't been reached since the birth of the kitchen. Or the frizzy, tangled strands of a curly-haired person who just took a six hour car ride in a convertible. Top down, no hair ties. Sounds slightly nightmarish, right?
And yet most of us are drawn to link ourselves with someone. We leap often, deal with the consequences later. And boy, can the consequences be weighty! Glass breaking, rocks crashing, running screaming for the hills weighty.
I am on this journey. I want so many things in this life, and one of them is to rewrite the rules. Make the equation work for me and those I love. And yes, the man I'm separating from is one of those people I love.
Can it be done? We shall see. I am setting my intentions now. I will make my decisions with love, out of a desire for balance, peace and forgiveness, for myself and for those in this family. Hope rules me.
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| Leeward coast of Oahu, sunset. One of those rare happy moments that you just want to freeze and relive over and over. |
